Wednesday, August 24, 2011

How The Skogs Spent Their Summer Vacation

This week marked the beginning of the school year and I figured this was as good of a time as any to help Superstar with what will undoubtedly be her first homework assignment, "How I Spent My Summer Vacation."  Let's Find out.

Skog Girls On Stage

Superstar had her annual dance recital in early June.  Luckily the dance recital gods favored our family this year and both of her numbers fell in the first half of the program.  I realize it's poor etiquette to leave early, but as much as I love my girls I'm still not quite to the "Sit through 60 numbers in a hot auditorium for 4 hours in June" stage of love.  Maybe someday, and yes I am certain that I just jinxed next year's recital schedule with those comments...

Not only did Toots and Rockstar have to dress up and wear fancy costumes to Superstar's recital, later in the Summer they had their chance to sing on stage at a Jeppson (Wheels) Family Reunion. Wheels and I didn't sign them up thinking they were too shy but come showtime they grabbed the mic and hopped right up and sang. Toots gave us a reverent rendition of Jesus Wants Me For A Sunbeam while Rockstar brought the house down with a 3 min plus cover of the Spongebob classic Best Day Ever.  To her credit, Superstar also performed I Am Like A Star that night but there is no recorded evidence.  You'll just have to take our word for it that she did just as well as her little sisters.


Superstar, Toots and their cousins Max, Millie and Henry as well as some neighbor friends formed a team this summer, The Mighty Blue Raptors. Toots was probably just a tad too young to play as she spent much of her time flirting with her male teammates but she did win the award for most adorable in the league. Superstar started off the season well but her swing somehow declined over the season and morphed into what Coach Erik described as a baseball version of Charles Barkley's golf swing. The season was somewhat of a bust because the kids only wanted to bat and spent their fielding time sitting down in the infield. Papa J was disgusted at this new, "Everyone bats, nobody gets out" type of system and frankly, so was I. Next year we want the real deal - learn the game and the rules, you get out, kids crying as the umpire calls them out on strikes, you know, the good stuff.

Superstar Rides a Bike

I'm not sure if I should be proud or disgusted because Superstar was two years ahead of the pace established by her father. I am all for being an overachiever at certain things but balance, irrational fear and coordination aren't on my approved list. Lucky for Superstar she takes after her mother and those things are Wheels Family approved.

4th of July

We spent the night of the 4th of July in usual fashion - bbqing and lighting off our Costco meats and fireworks. We later discovered how to really celebrate the 4th. My sister Kristine's neighbor owns a firework stand and after the holidays he lights off his excess inventory. With the relaxed laws this year it was quite a spectacle - 4 aerials going off at a time for nearly 90 mins. Honestly it was better than most city shows and would highly recommend it for next year.

Toots Gets A Haircut

Always the fashionista, Toots decided it was time for a fresh look and Wheels herself chopped off her young locks and gave her this nice bob cut. Superstar also went to a salon and got a 'real' ie: Non Wheels haircut but as usual there is no recorded evidence of this event. Can't wait until she gets older and hates us.

Best Summer Ever

As previously seen, when Rockstar wasn't watching Spongebob this Summer she spent the rest of her time singing his song.

Bear Lake

Wheels' youngest brother returned from his mission in Uruguay and this allowed her family to have nearly all of the family together for the first time in many years. Andy and May didn't want to travel for some reason so they missed out. Oh, right - May was only 40 weeks pregnant at the time, fine, I suppose that is a good enough excuse. Well, they were missed as the rest of us spent half a week at the mulch beach, on the water, or stuffing our faces while we sat on the deck overlooking the lake. Speaking of food, the Wheels family ate the entire dozen bratwurst I grilled and I've never been so proud to call myself a member of their family.

Summer Fun

Well that about does it for the report. It was kind of an odd and strangely stressful Summer but one day we'll look back and wish we could do it all again.

Monday, May 16, 2011

The Skog Fam Weeks in Review - Spring Montage Edition


The writers' strike has ended and we can finally get back to blogging.  Don't breakout your awards show gowns and tuxes just yet though because The Skog Blog Awards have been shelved and will be released at a later date.  Everybody knows that it's never a good sign when a release date gets pushed back so interpret that news as you will - ie: the post probably sucked.  It will see the light of day at some point.

For now, let's find out what's been going on in the Land of Skog since the end of February.  Lots of parties and the usual tomfoolery.  In movies, how does one bring the audience up to speed or move the story along quickly?  We call that a montage.  Consider this the Spring Montage Edition of The Skog Blog.  Most of this entries will be pics only unless a brief explanation is warranted.  Let's get to it.

Rockstar Turns 2

Spring Break 2011 in St. George 

Some of the Skog Fam spent the week in St. George and not only was there no golf involved but we went hiking. I know, I don't know who we are anymore either.

Herms' Birthday Bash

Herms turned 40 and being the nerd that he is, decided to have a board game themed party. Wheels finally got to breakout the saloon girl outfit that her mother sewed when Wheels was in high school. The girls went as characters from Candyland - Princess Frostine and Lolly and I went as Operation. I'm very sorry to all in attendance but give even more heartfelt apologies to the neighbors who had their dinners interrupted while we did this photo shoot. More extensive coverage can be found here.

Easter and kg's Birthday 

This year I got to share my birthday with Easter so you know what that means - Egg Salad Cake! The girls got me a personalized mug to better consume my yerba mate and Wheels made me a cherry chip cake from scratch. Good times.

Papa J Turns 65

The Sunday before Papa J turned 65 we threw him a Florida themed surprise party. The beauty of it was that we actually surprised him which is darn near impossible these days, what with his fancy new iPhone and what not...

Mother's Day

A few days before Mother's Day, Superstar loudly whispered to me to come into her room and shut the door. She had been to Fresh Market and said we really need to get Wheels a big cake and some really pretty flowers. On Saturday, we shipped Wheels out to a little spa retreat and made a quick run to pickup the cake and pretty flowers and then the girls decorated it as can be seen in the photos below. Sunday night Superstar decided that Wheels hadn't had enough pampering for her special day and decided to give her a real spa treatment. Ooh, la, la.

Spring Soccer

Toots' First Trip to the Dentist

The Skog Olympics

Superstar, Toots and their cousins, Henry and Millie each participated in the Elite Gym Olympics which was basically a 'recital' to show off what they had learned over the past few months. The gym lighting didn't allow for the greatest pics or clips but make sure to look for the following Henry highlights - 1 - his photobomb on the pic where Superstar and Millie get their medals and 2 - his front flip on the tumbling routine that brought the loudest gasps and cheers of the day.

Misc Spring Fun

Assorted pics from this spring followed by a video clip that many have already seen on Facebook but I felt like it deserved another post especially since some of the readers are not on Facebook. I guess that new fangled iPhone can't do everything for you Papa J.

I feel like Toots really captures the emotion of this Simon and Garfunkel classic about a lover scorned. I think Henry and Millie were the ones who actually taught our girls this song because I saw Henry singing his heart out in a similar fashion many times in St. George. Perhaps Kim needs to see this video and raise us another clip of them belting out I Am a Rock. PS: Yes, I am aware that this video is out of sync but I don't have time to fix it right now. Video is now ok.

Thanks for taking the time to get caught up with the Skogs and this blowhard of all blowhard posts. Hopefully we shall meet again much sooner next time.


Sunday, February 27, 2011

The First Annual Skog Blog Awards

Most of my family, friends and readers have probably long since abandoned this blog.  I blame myself.  Well, I guess I kind of blame Wheels and my girls too, but mostly, myself.  Actually, I need to blame my genetics as well - the fact that I fall asleep as soon as I sit down on the couch (thanks, Big J) but after that, I would totally have to take the lion's share of the blame.  No more excuses - it is time for the triumphant return of The Skog Blog.

I have some good news for anyone who found tonight's Oscar telecast to be underwhelming and was left wanting more.  To get things started this week I will be presenting the First Annual Skog Blog Awards - The KayGees and the Wheelies - selected, with love, by yours truly and my sweet wife, Wheels.  However, before we get to the awards I would be remiss if I didn't take some time to pay tribute and respect to all of the blog posts and memories that passed us by during the three month Skog Blog Hiatus.

Thanks for the memories - Thanksgiving, Christmas, Pukefest 2010, New Years with the Wheels Family, Misc Winter Experiences and Valentine's Day - you will be missed but never forgotten.

Tune in tomorrow night for the first awards! Good Night and Good Luck to the Nominees!

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Strange Competition Nears End

(Northern UT)

A local family decided to spend their weekend in a very unconventional manner - by having a vomit and diarrhea competition.

"I've always enjoyed having a post-Thanksgiving cleanse," stated the father, kg, "but with the increase in popularity of Black Friday we decided to push it back a week to avoid any conflicts.  Plus with my fear of public rest rooms it would not have been as successful as it has ended up being."

Their oldest daughter, Superstar, got the ball rolling early on Thursday morning when she rolled over and puked down the wall of her bedroom.  Hearing the commotion, the youngest, Rockstar, said "I wanna fo up too, Mommy," and proceeded to throw up down her mother Wheels' back.  The two siblings battled throughout the day with the Superstar finishing on top with five official spew sessions.

Their efforts paled in comparison to those of their other sister Toots.

"Toots really stepped up her game this weekend," said kg, "I know she'd been getting down on herself because her vomit just wasn't falling this year.  I told her to take it one vomit at a time and continue to give 110% and it would all work out."

And work out it did.  In what is likely a Skog Family record, Toots was able to lose her milk and cookies not once, not twice but 10 times over a 24 hour period.

"I am just happy we planned ahead with this one," added Wheels.  "We had the bowl ready so each time Toots said she was going to throw up kg had the light switch on and I got the bowl in place and to little Toots' credit she never overshot the bowl.  We missed out on a lot of sleep but it was worth it to avoid the laundry and to have minimal cleanup."  

"I am very proud of Toots.  I had no idea something so small could blow that much chunk," stated her father.

Not being much of a vomiter kg made his contributions elsewhere.

"I'm not sure he was even sick," said Wheels, "I mean, he spent 4 hours on the toilet today but that's only 15 min more than most Saturdays."

"I wasn't happy with my performance at all this year.  I trained daily for hours and I ate as poorly as possible leading up to this weekend.  I mean checkout this menu starting Thursday - Chipotle, InNOut, Ben & Jerrys, Tornados from Maverick and then Ruby River.  I should have been in the bathroom for at least six hours."

The true diarrhea champion may very well have been the Rockstar.  "A few times it sounded like someone poured a pitcher of water in her diaper," said her father.

"I can't remember smelling anything so foul," added her mother.

Whether it was from the smell, lack of sleep, or envy, Wheels finally got into the mix Sunday morning.

"I've only puked four times so far but I got more in me, I'm a trooper," declared Wheels as she headed back to bed for some much needed rest.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

The Skog Family Season in Review

It's the time of year where campaign promises and lies are thrown around like confetti at a parade.  Well I'd like to clear up a few of the rumors that have been floating out there about the Skogs.  No, we haven't moved to England so I can "get my hooligan on" as some have said.  I have NOT locked myself in my room and vowed not to shower or shave or even come out until my sports teams start winning, I just grow hair very quickly.  Toots has NOT driven us to the brink of madness from lack of sleep, in fact, she's been doing quite well sleeping in her bed for the past few months (nice job jinxing that kg, I wrote this last night before bed and wouldn't you know it we had a nighttime visitor.  I'm not gonna say it was Toots but she was small and wore footie pajamas and apparently has 7 elbows and 3 knees.)

The truth is this - sometimes you get overwhelmed. You procrastinate. You know that you have tons of things you should be adding to your blog but just don't know where to start. Well let me tell you a story. Once upon a time there was a boy named Paul. Paul's 'family' was in a really big hole and was unsure how to dig themselves out. Paul said, "Let me dig" and dig he did indeed. It was glorious. He dug them out of the hole, killed the bad guys, got the princess and blew up the death star or something like that. The End.

After that inspirational story I knew I could finish this blog post that was started two months ago, in fact, I had to. Also, in the spirit of promises that will never be kept - I promise, if elected, to update this blog daily, to get better candy in the vending machines and to get our school yearbooks. Let's get to the Season in Review.

Last Days of Summer

Ahh, the good old days. The days before bus stops, homework, teachers, books and teachers' dirty looks.

Fancy Nancy Goes to School

Our girls love the Fancy Nancy Books. However, I fear the Superstar is taking her love a little too far. This was the First Day of Kindergarten Fashion Show followed by her teaching her sisters how to 'dress modestly' - who says kids get nothing from Family Home Evening?

Count Like a Rockstar

Not to be outdone with all of this school talk, the Rockstar decided it was time to show off her counting skills. She counts as well as her sister Toots used to know her "A-B-Bs".

When the Older Sibling Is Away...

Superstar kind of rules the house when she's home. The first few weeks she was at school the other girls weren't sure what they were supposed to do without her. They finally decided that sisters gotta hug, as long as it doesn't linger too long.

How to Eat Like A Rockstar

The Little Rockstar keeps going over the 20 lb threshold and then goes on hunger strikes and drops below.  She is our little Gandhi.  Wheels has gone to extreme measures to ensure that she is gaining weight - she drinks half and half with her milk and she gets to watch Backyardigans to keep her in her seat.

Superstar Soccer

Superstar had another successful season of Soccer. Wheels was good to get these action packed photos that make her look very interested because in actuality she spent most of the time looking around and holding hands with her cousin Millie. Let's just say I'm not sure Superstar is as in love with soccer as her old man is.

The Tooth Fairy

Lots of firsts and lessons learned this day. Superstar lost her tooth (first one), Toots broke a long string of nights sleeping in her own bed (she was afraid of the tooth fairy) and Wheels and I learned that you should always keep a few dollars lying around so the tooth fairy doesn't have to buy the teeth with large bills. We covered it up by saying the tooth fairy pays more for the first tooth (bullet dodged) otherwise I'd start pulling out my own teeth for supplemental income. I mean, have you seen my chompers? I'd get top dollar for those bad boys.

Toots Turns 3

Toots graduated from the Terrible Twos which gives Wheels and I about 4 more months until we start them up again with the Rockstar. Toots celebrated the way any three year old would - Tea Party with Krabby Patties, French Fries and Orange Juice.

Superstar Parties Like a Rockstar

Superstar turned 6 and we threw her a Rockstar Party. The kids were glammed up, split up into bands and a battle of the bands ensued. The bands did an excellent job especially given the fact that this was a Hannah Montana/Kidz Bop free zone and they didn't know the songs very well.  The bands didn't trash their hotel rooms too badly other than the fact that we're still finding those boa feathers throughout our yard and home.

Before we finish discussing birthdays let's take one more look at these cakes. Handcrafted by Wheels, she was the true Rockstar. Finally those hours spent watching Ace of Cakes paid off.  Well done, Wheels.

Halloween Pumpkins

I'm not sure which surprised me more this year while carving pumpkins - the fact that Toots was no longer afraid of them or the staggering amount of songs from the 1950s about monsters, vampires, etc. Seriously, next time you need some Halloween songs don't waste $5 for the cheesy mix compilation at Target, just setup a station on Pandora Internet Radio called, "Monster Mash" and prepare to have your mind blown.

Halloween 2010

And finally, The Skog Girls present - The World's Worst Halloween Photoshoot - Enjoy! See older kids look away from the camera while you try and get the younger kids to focus. Watch in amazement as tiny witch hats and costume accessories are destroyed by the wind and rain! Oh well, at least the kids were adorable. In other Halloween news - I could have sworn I had some pics of the older Bells in their Halloween gear. Unfortunately I did not. Hopefully my sister will get around to posting them on her blog because they were fantastic.