Sunday, March 15, 2009

Music Industry Has High Hopes For New Super Group

(Associated Press - March 14, 2009)

Northern UT >> The music industry is on fire today as both Rolling Stone and Spin Magazine are reporting that the infamous Skog Sisters have officially united and formed a yet to be named Super Group. Rumors had been circulating for the past two weeks that P (lead vocals) and Toots (horns and percussion) had found themselves a new guitar player who had recently burst onto the music scene. This news has been confirmed by Band Manager, KG. "The reports are true. Lil' J is out of rehab and she is ready to join the band. I hope you are ready to have your minds blown by the greatest music the world has ever heard," said KG in a prepared statement.

Legendary music critic Lester Bangs said, "Not since Nirvana changed the music industry in the early 90's have we seen something like the Skog Sisters." Not all critics have been as complimentary. When asked his opinion, American Idol judge Simon Cowell declared, "I don't see what the big deal is. They are nothing more than an ABBA cover band at this point. It's purely karaoke."

"I'm very pleased with the kind words from Mr. Bangs," said KG. "That is much kinder than what he has said about me in the past. In fact, my only fear is that the girls experience too much success too soon and Lil' J ends up right back in rehab."

The band is scheduled to enter the studio this week, choose a name and begin recording their debut album.

PR Kit For the Skog Sisters

Ever the fighter, Lil' J struggles to overcome her addiction to milk by syringe and manufactured oxygen.

The Skog Sisters meet their new guitar player, Lil' J.

P poses before hitting the stage.

Toots (The Heartbreaker) tells the boys she's too young.

P prepares for a stage dive.

Toots leaving the stage after the show.

P relaxes with Lil' J after their debut performance.

Taken one second before Toots punches a paparazzi while all hopped up on fruit snacks and french fries.

P living the Rock Star Lifestyle.


Kim said...

Can't wait to hear the music these three will play!

Jen said...

You are a lucky man to have three beautiful daughters.

GinaM said...

Glad to see them united at last!!

Corbie said...

Which one do you think will go for pink hair and body art?

Congratulations!!! (and that whole bit about the 2 lbs. that HE can gain was classic :)

Corbie said...

Oh, and I meant the 2 days that HE can gain. What can I say? I'm a woman - I think in pounds.

brohammas said...

Wow, theyr back together!? I think I saw them at the Art Hunter homecoming and they set the roof on fire!

Maya Simmons said...

congrats Kirk and Elise! Kirk, you are one lucky "manager".